There is a popular expression we use in our culture that says that things change in a “New York Minute” which insinuates that things constantly change in an instant. Living here (or in Jersey) has reiterated how much truth there is to that statement. Even since my last post so much has changed.
I’m officially staying in New Jersey. There’s another not as popular expression that says “take what you have, and make it fabulous.” I realized that I have been blessed enough to have a situation that worked and being that I am 3,000 miles from my family and friends, there are a lot more mortifying things than living in Jersey; trust me I see it daily. So instead of using the money for 1st months rent, last months rent, security deposit, “brokers fee”, and whatever other ridiculous charges this city tries to rob you with a simple apartment move, I’m going to use that money to make Jersey more like Jayce. With a couple coats of paint and channeling my inner lesbian on some minor home improvement fixers, I’ll have this little apartment looking great in no time!
Another event proved that things change in the blink of an eye. Just a week ago on Sunday I was fortunate to finally have my day I’ve been yearning to have for the past 2 months. I had brunch! It worked out that Jynx, my recent ex, had gotten back from VA Beach that morning from his nieces Sweet 16 birthday party. He met me at the world renowned 1st Corinthians Baptist church in Harlem, so famous that they have a “tourist section” full of white people in the nose bleed seats of the congregation intensely observing how African Americans praise and worship. So bazaar. After church we jumped on the classic 2 express train and headed downtown to Chelsea for blueberry pancakes and timed bottomless mimosas. Yasss!
Well I needed the mimosas because that’s when the bomb hit. I was told that Jynx had a job interview. A great opportunity… in a whole other country. He was flying out in 3 days and would have to decide whether to take the position shortly after. I was stunned, taken back, and proud. Having being involved in the humbling struggle for security and stability I knew how big a deal this was and had the potential to be. Trying to mentally put myself in the same situation, I honestly would not know what I would do myself. I could not play the selfish role. As much as I love him just as a person, if this is what he is called to do than I have no right to tell him to stay, especially given that we are not even together right now. It’s not my place and I know I need my space to heal, grow, and recover from this last break up. I instantly decided to be 110% supportive of any decision he decides to make, as long as it is his own. I hope he seizes the opportunity, just know I was going to miss him like hell.
As I got behind the wheel of a vehicle for the first time since arriving in this industrial city and headed to JFK to drop off Jynx for his 7am flight, it took me back years ago to a younger me when I dropped off another past love at LAX as he left for grad school. In fact, this is the third time someone who I was dating or talking to came across an amazing opportunity that caused them to leave right after things ended. I’m starting to believe that maybe somehow, some way, I’m meant to prep people for their calling. If he does leave, maybe we’ll meet again somewhere down the line. Not something new, but something different.
Well he got the job. Today was the deadline for the offer haven’t heard from him. Guess we shall see… Until then, I’m going to enjoy what life has to offer me and I hope it comes with a mimosa or two. I plan on making this summer in New York epic!
Published: June 4, 2013; Transferred: Oct. 17, 2013
JAYCEBARON: the BLOG | 